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Matters of the Heart. Has a Commercial Fuck turned into a torrid Love Affair which has turned your life upside down? Fear not. We have experts here who can help you through your roller coaster ride. Tell us your story and we'll do our best to help.

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  #16  
Old 14-04-2023, 05:17 PM
Ylenol Ylenol is offline
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Re: Possible to make friends with the SYTs working in my company?

Just smile and make small chat
  #17  
Old 19-04-2023, 04:21 PM
SadLoser SadLoser is offline
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Re: Possible to make friends with the SYTs working in my company?

Quote:
Originally Posted by peanodood1337 View Post
If making friends is all you're aiming for, its seriously not difficult. Just make sure you aren't walking up to them out of the blue to say hi - that's super obvious and it makes you look like a creep. Only yandaos can get away with this.

Find some opportunity where there's a legit reason to make small talk. E.g. need to sort out some work with them, stuck waiting for the elevator, getting caught in the rain, company event, CSR, social committee etc.

When your foot is in the door, get them BBT and snacks. Tell lame jokes. Be the guy that's kinda fun to know. Someone you yourself would want to befriend. In the best case scenario, you'll find some common topics, work from there, and you'll be buddies in no time. In the worst case scenario, you'll end up at simp level, buying stuff and running errands for them.

Anyway, why are you resigned to calling yourself a "low level average joe"? From your post record, seems like you're a frequent flier at Geylang. Why not save up the money to level yourself up? It all adds up quite significantly. You could further your studies so that you'll not be stuck in a "low level" job. You could buy a gym membership, get trendier clothes etc. so that you don't look like an "average joe". At the very least, you'll feel much better about yourself at the end of the day.

Either way, good luck my dude.
Thanks for the superb suggestions! Will try them out when there are opportunities.

You are absolutely right - for tall yandao guys getting to know girls is like buying a piece of cake.

But for guys who are not attractive physically, it's not easy - the women will either think you're a creep or befriend you & treat you like a simp

The reason I cheong GL regularly is its not easy for me to befriend girls naturally. I am short (1.68m), very skinny with poor skin conditions. Many female classmates & colleagues have made fun of my physique through school days - call me shortie, midget, little guy etc. I have also tried dating apps - the moment I told a girl my height (she asked me), she stopped replying my messages totally. Many profiles also indicate they will only date guys who are 1.75m & above etc

Throughout my entire life, no female colleague has ever bought me anything not even a cup of tea. I've seen other guy colleagues who have syts buy them bbt, snacks, chocolates etc. For me, my female colleagues will only call me when they need somethk from me (help them run an errand, do OT for free etc). Otherwise they always pretend treat me like invisible in office.

But I am resigned to my fate. Heaven has made me very unattractive physically and most girls are turned off by my looks. Hence I can only spend money to buy happiness (i.e. sex)
  #18  
Old 19-04-2023, 09:20 PM
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Willamshakspear Willamshakspear is offline
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Re: Possible to make friends with the SYTs working in my company?

Quote:
Originally Posted by SadLoser View Post

But I am resigned to my fate. Heaven has made me very unattractive physically and most girls are turned off by my looks. Hence I can only spend money to buy happiness (i.e. sex)
Make no mistakes. Fate & Destiny are as different as chalk & cheese. The gift of life comes with FREE WILL, to choose your fate. Destiny is ALREADY decided & thus the purpose of the gift of life - a promise made eons ago to fill the stars...

Tall, short, fat, thin, objective beauty, white, black, rich, poor, etc are only skin deep.

What TRULY matters is your heart, & the Golden Rule which all Humankind follows. It is just a simple rule - do not do unto others that you do not want others to do unto you.

We Humankind are all born equal, with gifts & purpose in life, not Destiny alone but to create our own free will with the main gift of life. Humans are not robots, & thus the need for free will, to fulfill destiny.

Robots are created to perform jobs, never deviating & thus room for errors. Which computer user had not seen their laptops, computer, handphones, cars, machines, etc NOT failing? Robots are dead the moment they fail, which is fairly frequent, as most will attest to.

However, Humans are biologically different. We do have a task, but will do its best to correct errors, to fight against others, to be a champion, as we, male or female, had proven as a mere biological sperm to fertilize the female egg to open our eyes to the World.

It is your choice, of free will, to be who you want to be & the life you want for yourself. Sexual relief is a choice, but when age catches up & facing erectile dysfunction among other health issues, who will take care of you?

The family is the building block of civilization. Without a family, there can be no civilization, no govt, no progress.

It may seemed that you feel unwanted, but the truth is far from realities witnessed worldwide. Had there not be marriages & fulfilling lives between short & tall couples? Had there not be meaningful marriages between seemingly Human OUTWARD differences?

It lays within you & the belief in yourself. Fate is just an excuse, a mere word, but it is your MENTALITY & mental strength to RISE above mere excuses, to live a meaningful life that ALL had been gifted with, to change others or be changed by others to find a better journey in life.

All the best bro. Do not, never, live the gift of life in low esteem. Have courage, you are far far better & capable of more than you believe now in yourself.
  #19  
Old 20-04-2023, 11:23 AM
drinknsmoke drinknsmoke is offline
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Re: Possible to make friends with the SYTs working in my company?

Kudos to you trying to make the first move which I understand for shy people is a pretty big step.

I would like to offer another way for you to be more comfortable making your move. If you are not satisfied with the way you look, probably have to go the route of gyming for good body liao. Also, do basic grooming for yourself with a suitable haircut and zeng as much as you can. I mean, girls have makeup... Some guys I know that are not comfortable with how they look used basic makeup which boosted their self-confidence. I'm not exactly trying to push you in that direction but just to let you know that there are options out there for you. You're not the only guy feeling that you look unattractive.

Start by being more sociable in your current ops environment. I believe you want to try your best not to screw things up and be known as the creepy dude from ops team. Start being sociable somewhere, make casual convos with people around you in a more comfortable environment. If you meet new people during your work, use them as training targets by making small talk. As you get more comfortable being the one to initiate the conversation, probably by then you might be more comfortable approaching your main targets to make friends with.

True story of what I did to get to know a girl from work. I worked in a big office environment where sometimes we will get bubble-tea / food for the group, taking turns buying back because sometimes its too fucking hot and rather eat in office at the conference room together instead. This new syt that recently joined, once during buyback, I purposely missed out her order during group order for bubble tea. She was pretty pissed but at least I gained her number via "Text me your order next time so I definitely won't forget".

Using this as a point for convo --> I casually asked her what are her usual orders and talked a little about what flavors we liked, sugar % and other bubble tea stores quality etc. The next time when I bought the group order, I ordered 1 extra for her to 赔罪. As a tryhard texter, I always tried to leave the conversation open for a response from her. I didn't text her daily but when opportunity arrives sometimes we would rant about work / colleagues to each other etc. Kept things mostly casual but eventually got to know her more when I planned after work dinner with some other colleagues to chill and chit chat and also invited her and asked her to bring friends along if she wants.

To OP, things I did you can treat as sort of an encouragement post or you can try to do yourself also. Whether it might be suitable for you anot, I won't know but I do know the feeling of people telling you to be more casual to get to know new people but you feel lost and dunno what the fuck to do. Because I had been in that situation before. I started being more sociable via learning to make casual talks in my comfortable environment with people around me then I started to branch out to know more people.

Piece of advice would be try not to leave conversations closed where there is no room for reply. You killing her and killing yourself at the same time.

Example of casual open ended talk if you guys are texting:

"Hi, today weather very hot hor?" --> Deadend statement you might get a Yes or No leading nowhere.

vs

"Hi, Weather is killing me today, I'm going to grab something cooling, you want anything?" --> Open-ended. Yes or No you got control. If No, sometimes I get her cold water because universally acceptable option then move on. Yes, you might have something to talk about and continue on from there.

Good Luck to you moving forward and coming out of your comfort zone.
  #20  
Old 20-04-2023, 02:46 PM
sbwow sbwow is offline
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Re: Possible to make friends with the SYTs working in my company?

The first word that came to mind was "doormat". HAHAHA.

Here's a step-by-step guide when being treated like a doormat. HAHAHA.

https://www.marriage.com/advice/rela...-be-a-doormat/
  #21  
Old 22-04-2023, 07:24 PM
roadtohell roadtohell is offline
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Re: Possible to make friends with the SYTs working in my company?

Quote:
Originally Posted by SadLoser View Post
Thanks for the superb suggestions! Will try them out when there are opportunities.

You are absolutely right - for tall yandao guys getting to know girls is like buying a piece of cake.

But for guys who are not attractive physically, it's not easy - the women will either think you're a creep or befriend you & treat you like a simp

The reason I cheong GL regularly is its not easy for me to befriend girls naturally. I am short (1.68m), very skinny with poor skin conditions. Many female classmates & colleagues have made fun of my physique through school days - call me shortie, midget, little guy etc. I have also tried dating apps - the moment I told a girl my height (she asked me), she stopped replying my messages totally. Many profiles also indicate they will only date guys who are 1.75m & above etc

Throughout my entire life, no female colleague has ever bought me anything not even a cup of tea. I've seen other guy colleagues who have syts buy them bbt, snacks, chocolates etc. For me, my female colleagues will only call me when they need somethk from me (help them run an errand, do OT for free etc). Otherwise they always pretend treat me like invisible in office.

But I am resigned to my fate. Heaven has made me very unattractive physically and most girls are turned off by my looks. Hence I can only spend money to buy happiness (i.e. sex)
you call urself short

tell that to real 1.6m midgets

Last edited by roadtohell; 22-04-2023 at 07:25 PM. Reason: spelling
  #22  
Old 22-04-2023, 07:45 PM
roadtohell roadtohell is offline
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Re: Possible to make friends with the SYTs working in my company?

Quote:
Originally Posted by drinknsmoke View Post

Using this as a point for convo --> I casually asked her what are her usual orders and talked a little about what flavors we liked, sugar % and other bubble tea stores quality etc. The next time when I bought the group order, I ordered 1 extra for her to 赔罪. As a tryhard texter, I always tried to leave the conversation open for a response from her. I didn't text her daily but when opportunity arrives sometimes we would rant about work / colleagues to each other etc. Kept things mostly casual but eventually got to know her more when I planned after work dinner with some other colleagues to chill and chit chat and also invited her and asked her to bring friends along if she wants.
any results from doing this?

sounds like a way to become a doormat simp
  #23  
Old 25-04-2023, 01:27 AM
drinknsmoke drinknsmoke is offline
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Re: Possible to make friends with the SYTs working in my company?

@roadtohell You are definitely not wrong. I think to differentiate doormat would be your intentions and how you behave. In this case, I was motivated to get to know her and possibly bang her. Doormats are usually on the call and immediate response to the girl, machiam without the girl you would die. Keep a cool head, invest some time, if it doesn't work, move on to another. Plus concurrently also have other girls also lah... Its not like that girl will just stick to you and talk only with you.

If you find yourself waiting for her messages, being overly nice to her to a point of creepy, chances are, you are a doormat. Time to get the fuck out~
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